Baby Talk

As Finley grows and starts to become more aware of her surroundings and especially of her mommy and me, I sense that she’s in the beginning stages of communication. She’s not chiseling antelopes on our walls, but she is figuring out how her noises and body movements help her to get what she wants. Her arsenal of noises range from cooing to whimpers to grunts. And then there’s the old standby, the all-out cry. But even her crying is becoming selective to the needs she has. In fact her cries change depending on if she gets what she wants right away or not. The madder she gets the more tragic her cries become. She’s already becoming a drama queen, like her mama. Of course, Heather has no idea what I am talking about.

A typical communication session goes like this: She’ll be sleeping and either wake herself up with a jolt or just lay there as her eyes open. Once she figures out that she’s pretty much trapped like a turtle on her back, the first set of noises begin. There might be a subtle cooing sound or some heavy nose snorts to signal that sleep may not return. It’s like she’s trying to figure out who’s near, because if there is no immediate response, she’ll repeat the sounds. Sometimes she jumps straight into a short cry. It’s actually more of a yell. Sort of a, “Hey! I’m waking, here!” If it’s the middle of the night, she might realize that nobody’s rushing to her side and fall back to sleep. Or she’ll repeat the sounds then move on to grunts of frustration. Or she might decide that this is the time to wake up, and move to a nice, loud cry. That’s usually the time one of us picks her up.

The first few moments after the pickup are important, here. If she’s hungry, she’ll jump into the multiple, sustained cries which signal the need for food. Sometimes, she just wants to look around, from up high and may softly suggest with a couple of whimpers that she could snack, if it’s available. Ninety percent of the time, she needs a diaper change and depending on the previous hungry/slightly hungry mode, that could be a nice, easy pit stop or it could be a wrestling match. Either way, a bottle or a boob are most likely in the near future.

Now, our little angel may only be five weeks old, but she’s already becoming a picky eater. She loves to nurse for two reasons; The food and the comfort. Often times, to Heather’s dismay, she’ll suckle for a few minutes and conk out. Heather has to poke and prod and tickle Finley to remind her that she’s there for a reason. Then there are the times we bottle feed her. And since I am lactose intolerant, which means I don’t nurse, Daddy’s feeding times are all about the bottle. And as of late, I’m having to keep the wiggle worm at bay, while constantly reminding her that yes, this is still food. She’s not a big fan of the bottle… at first. But once she realizes that the food flows a little faster, she calms down. Eight times out of ten, after a bottle feeding and a big burp, she’s out for the count.

It’s during these bottle feedings… my most intimate time with her… that I wonder what’ going on in that little brain of hers. I mean, she has virtually no vocabulary to work with, so what are her thoughts? Are they images or from her five-week old memory? Sometimes when she sleeps, she seems to frown or smile or even wake herself up as if she’s scared. What could she possibly be dreaming? I would think her dreams would be limited to a short life spent looking up at us. So maybe she’s dreaming about us.

But it’s also during these bottle feedings that I wonder how long this will last. This constant dependence on these two people who are always looming overhead. Most of you out there will say it never ends. And as I think about that, it doesn’t seem so bad. We spend a good portion of our lives alone and/or looking for someone to be with. And here’s this little person that needs you. Right here. Right now. It can be overwhelming. But to me, as a new daddy, I wouldn’t want it any other way. Besides, it won’t be too long before she’s using her words and instead of a loud wail, it will be a loud “DADDY!” And I’ll get up in the middle of the night and go see what I can do for my little noisemaker.