Three Big Words

Finally. I’ve been waiting, patiently, for two years and two months. And Friday it finally arrived. 

What was it? I’ll tell you, in a moment. You see, there are a few things we dads secretly long for from our children.  If we have boys, we want a strong left arm and/or a good backswing (for golf or tennis or guitar or all). For our girls, we might want those two things as well, but we tend to lean more toward good grades and utter devotion to the dad. These are all things we want to come naturally. Sure, we could help mold them, refine them, but you want to see these things appear early on.

But for me, there was one more little, itsy bitsy thing I wanted to have happen. One little, slightly selfish request from my daughter, that I couldn’t prompt. Something she had to derive on her own. And on Friday, she delivered.

It happened in the morning, after she got up and I was getting her dressed for daycare. As many of you can relate, two-year olds don’t stay perfectly still during a scheduled pit stop. So, like any other parent, I have to find a way to keep her from wriggling off the changing table, while swapping the old tire for a new one. My usual weapon is silliness. I try to make her laugh or have her sing along with me… anything to keep her from focusing on getting away. A distraction technique, really.

This morning I chose a silly voice and not only did it work, I got a nice surprise in return. She giggled, sighed and said the three big words I’ve been waiting for… “You’re funny, daddy.” A chorus of angels arose from the crib, confetti filled the room and crowds erupted in applause. Actually, I just gave her a great big kiss, but that’s what it felt like.

For a guy like me, who tries to find the funny in pretty much everything I do, I longed for the day when my daughter would not only recognize humor, but acknowledge it… me.

And it was such a spontaneous thing. I hadn’t coached her on it or practiced it with her. No, I didn’t want to cheapen the moment. There was no performance enhancement going on, with my girl. She just came to the conclusion on her own and I can pretty much say she not only made my day, but my week/month/year.

As I think about why this was such a big deal to me, I find it interesting that we put so much emphasis on our kids’ firsts. First words, first steps, first tooth… And then it all becomes so mundane. Maybe it’s just because I’m a first-time dad, but I am amazed with pretty much everything she does.

Sure, her first steps were fun to see. But now as I watch her run through the house and navigate obstacles and jump on to cushions, I find it amazing how well she carries herself. When she said “Da Da” we clapped. Now she’s turning words into sentences, with her own special brand of emphasis. And I am astounded.

I know that as time moves on, I will get used to her moves and her speech to the point where it will be frustrating when she won’t want to go anywhere or won’t want to tell us what happened. But for this brief point in time, I get to watch her body and brain develop right before my eyes. And I get to help shape it.

I can teach her how to take care of herself and introduce her to a world of books and music that will expand her vocabulary and the ways she can express herself. And that’s really what being a parent is all about, isn’t it? We get to help create the next generation. Whether she’s some sort of artist or thinker or whatever she chooses, I can help her get there. But that seems a little much to put on a two-year old, right now. For now, I’m fine with her thinking I’m the funniest man alive. She’s my biggest fan and that’s all I need.