Hair Today

Now that Finley is two, we’re getting to the point where we have to start introducing her to more experiences that take her out of her safety bubble. She pretty much only knows home, daycare, and the occasional trip to a relative’s house. And even when we go out, she tends to cling to one of us until she gets used the person or situation.

Last month Heather took her to visit our dentist. It wasn’t a real appointment to check her teeth, but more of an introduction to the dentist and the office. Of course, she wouldn’t let go of Momma and wanted nothing to do with anything else. It’s like that when we go to the doctor. She’s fine until they start poking and prodding. But really, who is comfortable at the doctor …or the dentist, for that matter?

So, this past weekend we took another step outside of our next to take our shaggy short stack to get her haircut. Okay, so she wasn’t really that shaggy, but her hair was beginning to get a little out of control. So momma booked a time at this kiddy salon at the mall.

This place is set up just for kids. Each of the chairs are cars or planes and they have this great gimmick of handing the kids a small bucket of toys, so they’re not only distracted by a bunch of goodies, but their heads are always down, making it easy for the cutter to do her work. It’s a great idea… as long as you can get the kid in the chair. And that’s where we had trouble.

She liked the colors and the mirrors and the balloons in the place, but whenever we tried to set her down in one of the chairs, she dug clung on to us for dear life. We got one of her feet inside a seat that was made to look like a pink roadster, but the waterworks started and we knew we were out of luck. So, instead of getting her first real haircut in a car or a biplane, Finley sat on my lap, while the scissors went to work.

It really wasn’t much of a haircut. More of a trim of the ends and the bangs, but she got through it without a peep. Of course, she had her legs locked around one of mine while she dug through the toy bucket. She wasn’t going to go anywhere without me.

The thing is, we know – because she is a girl – that anything to do with her hair will eventually become something she will grow to love and enjoy. But getting to that point will take a while. Which is just fine with me and my checkbook.

Ultimately, she is going to learn to break out of her shy shell and learn to embrace new experiences. It starts with trips to the doctor and the dentist and the salon. But it eventually turns into those first days of school and continues on to the point where she leaves home for college or whatever she decides to do.

Until then – like it or not – we’re going to have to give her a little shove from time to time. She’s going to want to turn around and cling to us, but we’re going to have to help her learn to let go. And we’re going to have to let her go.

We’ve got plenty of time before some of those bigger moments in life, but in the end the message will still be the same: She’s going to have to take some steps by herself… but she can always come back when she needs to.

The truth of the matter is, I don’t mind that she wants to cling to me as hard as she can. I like knowing that she finds us as a safe place. I also know that over time, her grip will loosen to the point where she won’t need to cling to us anymore. I guess that’s the point when we’ll be reaching out for her.